oh why do we teach them anything??

so dont get me wrong i am glad that he can get himself a drink and tell me what he wants but i dont like trying to cattier to his every desire or cleaning up the mess when he spills water for the third time that day.... and what is this obsession with water anyways. seriously all water he will pull his kitchen chair to the sink and cry for me to turn the water on he always plays with the dogs water dish(including putting dog food in the water to get a disgusting soggy texture), he learned a long time ago how to flush the toilet and will do this over and over and over (luckily hasnt flushed anything yet{knock on wood}) he has also discovered that if he climbs up on the toilet and uses the toilet paper dispenser as a stepping stool he can easily get on the counter and play in the sink!! just the other day he told me to "wait a sec" and when i said what he said "just a sec"....... are you kidding me!! my least fav is that he has learned to open doors .... and will do so at his little hearts content.. though he is so funny about shutting them too.. when he gets up in the morning (or in the middle of the night) he opens his door shuts it behind him comes in our room and slams in behind him again.... ugh!! he loves to help in the kitchen and his fav thing is to crack the eggs and then squeeze in his hand! why? why? he now wont let anyone touch the hand mixer while hes mixing. grrr... yesterday he was biting clothes just for oh idk fun i guess and decided to bite my pants but he got my skin too and yelled out in pain and he just looked at me and then turned and ran away jumping in his toy box which was sitting just across the room from me and just sat there staring at me fake crying! such a little actor... i have no idea where he gets it from! he runs aways and talks back and get into everything.. so i think developmentally he is spot on... i really really wish it was morally ethically and legally acceptable to use toddler straight jackets... but those wouldnt be complete without the dirty sock duck taped in his mouth!! is that so wrong? am i the only one that has this desire? i just need a nap every once in a while... cant i just drug him?? does that make me a bad mom! i think not!!